


checking in

by days4daisy



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Dubious Consent, Extra Treat, Hand Jobs, M/M, Mind Manipulation, Possession, Season/Series 11
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-18 18:02:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29122371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/days4daisy/pseuds/days4daisy
Summary: Castiel keeps to himself in the quiet corner that remains his. Lucifer usually leaves him alone.Sometimes, though. Sometimes he comes to Castiel.
Relationships: Castiel/Lucifer (Supernatural)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 19
Collections: Chocolate Box - Round 6





	checking in

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kameiko](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kameiko/gifts).



> Have a wonderful Chocolate Box!

Lucifer usually leaves him alone. In his absence, Castiel enjoys his solitude in a corner carved for himself in his own mind. In this new reality, Castiel can appreciate what it is to give his autonomy to a presence larger than himself. Lucifer is evil - looming overhead and lurking around every corner. He floods Castiel's every pore. But in this new dual existence, Castiel remembers him as he was then. Grand, powerful, a light to cut all darkness. He remembers why Uriel called him beautiful. Why his call lured so many, and lures them still.

Castiel keeps to himself in the quiet corner that remains his. Lucifer usually leaves him alone.

Sometimes, though. Sometimes he comes to Castiel.

Lucifer appears in the guise of the human he once chose. The tragic soul Nick who said ‘yes’ for all the wrong reasons. Castiel can’t be sure whether Lucifer appears as he chooses or if Castiel chooses for him. He sees his brother as many see him - as skin and bone, contained by limits of the flesh. But Castiel sees through him too. His light pierces, wings mighty at his back. He was God’s favored. Castiel remembers.

“Hey, bro,” Lucifer says. “What’s up?” Castiel will never understand why Lucifer revels in colloquialisms. Does he find them ironic given his distaste for mankind? Or, in a twisted way, has he come to accept them as his own? Even appreciate them in his own hate-filled way?

Castiel sighs and fiddles with the antennae on his television. The little box set’s picture flickers and slides straight again. “Nothing,” he says. “Just waiting here. It’s what you want me to do, isn’t it?”

“That's the plan, yeah.” Lucifer leans against the door frame to the Winchesters’ kitchen. Castiel feels safe with the Winchesters. It’s why his safe haven looks like the bunker. Why the brothers' table separates him from the Devil.

Lucifer looks right and wrong stretched long against the door hinge. His human guise fills out its unassuming clothes - army green t-shirt and jeans ripped at one knee. The dim light of the kitchen shines off blonde hair styled soft and careless. His eyes might as well be black in the shadows.

“It’s better this way, isn’t it?” Lucifer steps into the room, every movement in precise measure. Perfectly imperfect, not a care in this world or any other. Castiel can see why Father loved him, and why He had to cast the serpent away. “You’ve fought the good fight for so long, haven’t you, Castiel? You’re tired, and here I am. Your big brother, swooping in to save the day.”

Lucifer may be the most convincing of liars, but Castiel still has enough of his own mind to scoff. “You can defeat Amara,” Castiel grumbles.”That’s the deal. You don’t care about anything else, and I’d rather you not pretend.”

But he is right about one thing. Castiel is tired. He has been for a long time, toiling under the weight of an absent God. Castiel lost his grace and regained it. Lost his mind and his physical being. Lost his light and his wings. Regained both, only for them to call him unimportant. Expendable. A sidekick.

It’s why Castiel had to do this, why he had no other option but to say yes to the very thing he despises the most. Lucifer can defeat Amara, Castiel believes it with every shred of faith he has left. Amara will be destroyed, or Lucifer - and Castiel with him - will die. Perhaps Castiel will be lost either way, torn apart by his brother once the deed is done.

It will be worth it if the world survives. If Sam and Dean live.

“I understand, you know.” Lucifer sets a hand on Castiel’s head. Castiel sighs but suffers it. His eyelids droop. “You’ve been alone, Castiel. You’ve loved but they haven't loved you back. You think I’m a monster. Some warped, twisted thing. And it’s true, you’re right. But I know what it’s like to love without love in return. I’ve been alone, little brother. I’ve suffered as you’ve suffered.”

“You’ve suffered for sins of your own making,” Castiel mumbles, but he isn’t angry. He’s long past the rile of his own temper. It’s true, after all. Lucifer does know what it’s like to be alone.

“That’s right.” Lucifer speaks softly to him. “I understand, Castiel.” His fingers dip under Castiel’s chin. When he presses, Castiel raises his head. Defiant, Castiel would like to think. Unafraid to look the Devil in the eye.

His glare earns a smile. With a snap of Lucifer’s free hand, the television grows dark. “I was watching that,” Castiel grumbles. They both know it isn’t true.

“My little brother,” Lucifer says; gentle, admonishing. The fingers set tenderly beneath Castiel’s chin are the same that snapped him into oblivion once. Castiel remembers. He accepts that he may die, but he still shivers at his brother’s touch.

It’s the reaction Lucifer wants, one that draws his consoling chuckle. “Don’t be afraid,” he says, and for a moment Castiel sees red in his eyes. “I’m not going to hurt you, Castiel. I’m going to thank you.”

Lucifer’s kiss makes Castiel think of quinces and damnation. Of Judas and serpents. Of blood-tainted roses. Castiel feels the human form, the narrow warmth of the vessel’s lips. But it’s also cold enough to burn under his brother’s power. So close, Castiel hears the mighty thrum of Lucifer’s hidden wings. He remembers them, remembers Lucifer in all his glory. Castiel allows himself to be guided to his feet. He lets Lucifer peel the trench coat from his shoulders, the tie and shirt as well. His slacks hit the floor with a gentle thump of fabric. Castiel’s back cuts against the kitchen table. Lucifer’s clothes rub his bare skin raw.

“Shhh.” Lucifer smiles against his lips. “Easy there, champ.” It’s only then that Castiel feels the tears on his cheeks.

Castiel does not bother wiping them. Lucifer’s hand is already around him, soft and wet where it should be abrasive. It’s as if Lucifer knows this vessel better than Castiel does. He touches Castiel in the most sinful of ways. His mouth feasts on Castiel’s throat as he presses Castiel down into the table. The small of his back twinges with discomfort. Castiel pays it no mind. His face warms from the strain, his breaths pant out. When Lucifer bites him, he gasps.

“Relax,” Lucifer purrs. “It’s just me.”

Lucifer handles Castiel until Castiel fears his legs will buckle. His thoughts run off, and chasing them proves impossible. His body responds at Lucifer’s will, bucking and jolting with abandon. Castiel moans between their lips. His squinted gaze is bleary.

It doesn’t take long for Lucifer to break him. His body is Lucifer’s now; his resolve is Lucifer’s as well. Lucifer drains him with patient full-fisted strokes. Castiel’s stomach becomes a mess of his own undoing.

When it’s done, Lucifer kisses Castiel’s forehead like a proud parent. “Soon, Castiel,” he says. “Hang in there, buddy. You’re doing great.”

He departs then, leaving Castiel dressed in his own mess with pants pooled around his ankles.

Castiel blows a shaking breath towards the ceiling of his own mind. Most days, at least, Lucifer leaves him alone.


End file.
